Chances are YOU know someone that is infertile!
Ha, obviously if you are reading my blog you know ME and that I am infertile.
But you probably know others, or maybe not (which is rare), but know someone who knows of an infertile person/couple.
This is for them/you.
This is for anyone that cares about me.
This is for EVERYONE.
Mrs R just posted this on her blog and I am stealing it.
The plain hard truth is anyone that has had a child DOES NOT understand infertility.
That's fabulous!
Luckily you don't have to wonder day to day if you will ever have a family.
It's a reality for you, a possibility, that isn't for some.
Take the time to read the article if you are interested in learning how to be sensitive to someone with infertility. It's a daily battle for us...a silent undercover heartache that people choose to judge instead of sympathize.
THANKS!
Here's a part from Mrs R that is also very sensitive for me too:
Don't Complain About Your Pregnancy
This message is for pregnant women-Just being around you is painful for your infertile friends. Seeing your belly grow is a constant reminder of what your infertile friend cannot have.
Unless an infertile women plans to spend her life in a cave, she has to find a way to interact with pregnant women.
The number one rule is DON'T COMPLAIN ABOUT YOUR PREGNANCY. I understand from my friends that, when you are pregnant, your hormones are going crazy and you experience a lot of discomfort, such as queasiness, stretch marks, and fatigue. You have every right to vent about the discomforts to any one else in your life, but don't put your infertile friend in the position of comforting you.
13 comments:
it is really nice to have an tactful and appropriate article like this...there are times i really get 'worn out' sympathizing with women in my life who have 'pregancy woes'..while my 'lack of prego' heartache is swept off to the side..it is a rare treat (i've yet to find) to have a friend that recognizes and realizes the need of sensitivity in this regard...thanks for the post :)
I read this on the R House and thought it was a great article. I can't even count how many times pregnant woman have complained about their pregnancies to me and it is like pouring salt into a wound.
I'm so glad you posted this, Jill. I have learned so much from you, and this was great to read.
Also loved your previous post about blooming where you're planted.
(I've been in a blogging rut, too!)
I truly admire your strength. You are such an amazing woman and mother! Thank you for your example.
love this! I read it on the r house too! Thanks for sharing love the video links you put on too so dang cute!!
Thanks for sharing. I never really know what to say--so I'm glad to know now. You are amazing and I'm so glad I get to rub shoulders with you...also thanks so much for the wonderful handbag--I forgot to say thanks--I love it!! You're awesome!
I loved the infertility etiquette post! I'm interested to learn some more infertility etiquette advice! What are some other things that can help with not "pouring salt into an open wound"?
This is something I have probably been at fault of doing. I have really hard pregnancies, litterally almost dying both times, so I'm sure I complain a lot more then I should. I try to remind myself throughout the whole thing how lucky I am to be prego, so thanks for the reminder to always be mindful of those around us, whatever their trials my be. :) You are always such a great example.
I love this post. It's so annoying that so many people don't get it. And, though we're different, I feel like 'secondary infertility' doesn't get the attention it deserves. People just write you off telling you you should be 'grateful' for what you got or they make assumptions that you want an ONLY child.
And apparently, I'm going down the whole secondary infertility road again. And I have to say, it sucks.
What a great article, I wish that EVERYONE would read it. It is so hard to deal with un-informed/ignorant people sometimes. Thanks for finding it and helping to inform others. You are amazing....thanks for all the insights, and heartfelt posts.
I didn't even know about that blog--thanks for linking to it!! It is amazing how insensitive people can be sometimes. I'm sure you and I have heard it all!! I just shake my head and laugh (tho it'd be easy to cry!) at some of the dumb things I've heard.
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