I spoke in our Sacrament meeting two weeks ago at church (to a congregation). My topic was parenting. But not just the "how-to's" or "why" we should be a parent. It was specified as PARENTING is a SACRED ROLE.
How often do you think of your role of a parent as being sacred?
I've always been taught this, and imagine I would have still believed this notion if I became a parent without the struggles I've gone through...but now it's my core belief. I understand that parenting is sacred because of the miraculous way I became a mother, and through my experiences of being a mother that have undoubtedly reaffirmed this principle.
It feels like the worlds view of being a mother or father is so frivolous these days and it's heartbreaking. I literally get overwhelmed thinking about the lack of parental role that exists and the neglect and abuse that goes on. I've seen so many children struggle and their lives ruined because of their parents. I truly ache from it.
I'm so grateful and eternally blessed that I have been entrusted with God's children. I feel honored that I get to raise two beautiful kids whom I love, and in return who help me become better as we learn together. I know I'm not perfect, and I try hard every day to appreciate the sacrifices I make as I try to be a parent my children deserve.
I'll share a few thoughts from my talk:
"Husband and wife have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. "Children are an heritage of the Lord" (Psalms 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, to teach them to love and serve one another, to observe the commandments of God and to be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners." -Proclamation to the Family
Raising children shapes our souls. Parenting offers a potent pathway to personal growth and reflection. It is a way for us to truly examine ourselves, our passions, our commitments, our dedication. It requires skills that our Heavenly Father possesses. We are entrusted with His children, that we will provide and support them in every needful thing!
The process of parenting is one of the most spiritually formative journeys a man and a woman can ever undertake. Unless we are stone cold spiritually, the journey of caring for, raising, training, and loving children will mark us indelibly and powerfully. We cannot be the same people we once were. We will be forever changed. Eternally altered. Spiritually speaking, we need to raise children every bit as much as they need us to raise them. I truly believe this. Once we become parents we are changed. Forever. For the better.
Jesus was on earth and taught by example, which is how we can learn to be like Him. But I believe one way we can learn to be like our Heavenly Father is by becoming parents. We learn what our Heavenly Father's qualities are, because they are the same that we need to possess. I know since becoming a mother my relationship has change with my Heavenly Father. I understand the love that He has for me so much more, because I have that love for my children. It’s overwhelming to comprehend.
Parents make legitimate claims on their children-respect and obedience for starters. But children make many claims on their parents. The fact that they exist calls out for out nurture, our care, our love, our commitment, our time, and our financial support. This claim that children have on our time, money, energy and thoughts can lead us into the spirit of sacrifice. A parents willingness to make such sacrifices has great spiritual benefit. Jesus saw sacrifice at the heart of what his followers did: he asked them to follow him and deny themselves, take upon his cross and follow me.
True spiritual maturity often reveals itself during those times God asks us to sacrifice.
Kids are rarely convenient. What they require in order to succeed rarely comes cheaply. To raise them well will require daily sacrifice of many kinds, which has the wonderful spiritual effect of helping mold us into the character of Jesus Christ himself. God invites us to grow beyond ourselves and to stop acting as though our dreams begin and end with US. Once we have children, we cannot act and dream as though we had remained childless.
Sacrifice defines love.
Think of the ultimate example we have of this, Our Heavenly Father’s willingness to sacrifice His only son, so we could live with Him again. No father has loved his son as our Heavenly Father loved Jesus. Yet his love made room for this sacrifice. Because parenting is such a sacred task sometimes God calls us to submit to a transcendent will far beyond our own.
Being a father or a mother is not only a great challenge, it is a divine calling. It is an effort requiring consecration. President David O. McKay stated that being parents is “the greatest trust that has been given to human beings.”
While few human challenges are greater than that of being good parents, few opportunities offer greater potential for joy.
May you honor your calling as a parent.
May you find joy in your experiences.
May you love your children as your Heavenly Father loves you!